32# - Leading While Healing: Navigating Business Through Life’s Toughest Moments

Hi guys. Welcome back to the show. I'm so excited to have you here this week and this week's episode is gonna be about how to sharpen your business when you are going through a hard time behind the scenes. Now I do quickly apologize because I've had a bit of a summer break.

so you've been seeing, re-release of the podcast episodes, but now I am well and truly back. So welcome back to myself and everyone that's listening, and also I hope you had a great summer and you've had an amazing, amazing start to September. So over the next few weeks, I'm gonna be doing a lot of solo episodes.

I've had so many requests for so many of you on, you know, to cover things like Q4 goals, how to have high cash months, how to, you know, really master your mindset. So I'm really excited to be getting into these solo episodes, but this one today is really around. What to do when life feels heavy, but your business still needs you to lead.

So in this episode, I'm gonna be really be pulling back the curtain on what it really looks like to show up in business, a really successful business, and being a CEO of your company. While navigating grief, burnout, heartbreak or personal challenges behind the scenes, so you can relate to that, so you'll learn how to actually lead with integrity without abandoning yourself.

The practical systems that I've actually put into place to support me during hard seasons and the nervous systems tools that I've relied on to stay grounded. Even when everything feels , overwhelming. So whether you are in a season of survival or preparing for one in the future, this honest, candid, empowering conversation is the conversation that I wish more women were having.

We are in this world, you know, hustle culture is glorified. And when, especially in the western world in the uk, we've got this culture that everyone has to be on all the time. You know, everyone's got access to email, dms, voice notes, like just so much, and I think it's really, really overwhelming. And then no one's having the conversation around what do you do when you go through challenges or hardships?

Your business and life like no one has that conversation. I've definitely not seen it. And the reason why I'm so qualified to speak on this is because over the last year, oh wow. Over the last two years, there's been some stuff that has really rocked me. over the last year we've had like four really close family deaths.

I've had some health stuff going on. My dad a couple of years ago, my dad was hospitalized like six times over winter. It's been quite the ride and I think that, I think when you are in your thirties and forties, we nav. We are navigating a lot as women, you know, aging parents, perimenopause, menopause.

Infertility challenges children. It, I feel like this, these are the decades that are most testing. I'm in my late thirties, so this is exactly what one's going through, you know, the aging parents and the health stuff, the gut stuff, you know. So I'm really gonna be focusing on, in this episode, on you, if you're going through something behind the scenes.

and you're still showing up, you're still holding it all and you're still trying to lead. Maybe you're grieving, maybe you are just exhausted. Maybe you are holding onto emotions that feel too big to name. I want you to walk you through how to show up with that integrity and compassion for yourself without burning out or hiding completely as well.

. The shine and rise a London: 2026

Honestly, I can't explain it. So this year we didn't have this event because. I was going through the four family deaths, but it's back in February. actually, the tickets have only been shared to the wait list or if you've been on my email list, they're not actually publicly available on social media just yet.

But if you want to get the special rate that's available now, then drop me a DM on Instagram. Dm me the word London and I will send you the special rate. One thing I want to say about these tickets is that the in we are not just saying, oh, the investment is gonna keep in increasing and it doesn't increase.

No. Anyone that knows who's been to this event previously, the investment goes up pretty much every month as we head closer to the event. So we really like to re reward the women that book early. The get their tickets that aren't a last minute, Larry, although there's nothing wrong with that. So if you obviously book now, you'll save a lot more.

and we are fully intending to sell this event, event out again. We have already had so many people purchase tickets, so many people that are interested, so many people that are gonna buy over the next few months, especially once you hear the speakers, especially when you hear about the location. So if you wanna secure yourself at special rate.

Then do drop me a DM and I will send you all of the details. So let's get into it. So let's start with the first part of the quiet reality of running a business in a storm. So I really wanna preface this by saying that, and I've kind of talked about it already, that we often feel this pressure to perform even when things are falling apart.

And I think this is the Instagram culture, the YouTube culture, the social media culture where everyone is literally glamorizing that hustle culture, glamorizing working 24 7, glamorizing the busyness. You know, busyness is like a badge of one of these days. You know, you speak to someone and they're like, oh, how are you?

And you go, oh my God, I've been so busy. And I have had my own relationship and journey with this. So I wanna give you a bit of background because I think it's really important. So when I first set my business, it's literally been 10 years since I set up my first wedding plan in business. I was 29. And of course I had all the time in the world.

obviously I was newly married. my husband was working in Canada. I did have a lot of time on my hands. But I really bought into hustle culture. Then I didn't know how to look after myself. I didn't know about health. I didn't know about regulating my nervous system. I didn't know about meditation.

I literally knew nothing. And what I was doing was basically I was in complete state of chaos. Which I think a lot of us women are, to be really honest, if you've come from an Asian background, especially, we are used to chaos. We are addicted to chaos, and I'd love to love for you to explore your relationship with chaos because this is definitely the relationship I had with my work and something that I have to really deeply work on Still.

so when I'm in chaos, what I mean is that I was waking up, used to have emails on my phone, which is the worst idea in the world. checking emails as soon as I got out of bed, downing like black Americanos, just like literally like logging onto my desk and just, I was, I was addicted to work. I was a workaholic.

I stopped seeing family and friends, which I think is fine because if you need to sometimes be, when you're in the building phase of your business, sometimes you do have to make sacrifices and I'm here for the sacrifices, but I was honestly burning out. I was like running my wedding planning company.

Then in: 2017

and I think that. I think when you are in your twenties, you can do that. Like early thirties maybe. But I think once you get to your, like mid thirties onwards, you have to start looking after yourself. Like you really have to take care of yourself. And I've been noticing this now, like I've had to take care of myself, especially over the last year and I, this year I've worked out that I've taken.

I think three months off already we're in September and I had to take time out A, because we had the family DAFs and I had some health stuff going on, but B, because I just could not function. Like when you are going through stuff, you can't just be there for everyone and pretend like put on a brave face and act hunky dory, like I totally get it.

Sometimes you have to do that, but for me, I didn't need to do that, so I didn't do that. So I think that also people, I think this is a thing that I was discussing with my mentor yesterday, is people don't understand seasons in business. So what I mean by that is that. People don't know nuances. So for example, me at the moment, I've obviously got my amazing husband, I've got a family life.

I've got parents who do not rely on me loads, but to a certain degree they do rely on me 'cause they can't speak English. My mother has learning difficulties, so I have to step in with a lot of their appointments and translation and, you know, sorting things out for them. You know, and I, I don't have children yet, you know, but at, at the moment, I would say I have got.

Time to pursue things at, at least now after all of these horrific deaths that have happened. time to pursue my goals and time to work on my business and time to like nurture myself, but someone who's literally got three children.a husband, maybe a dying mother or father or someone who's navigating a big illness like is completely different.

So one thing I really wanna say is like, if you have to take time out for yourself because you are navigating a big thing, like I worked with clients who have gone through IVF or I've got close friends at the moment who, you know, their family members are. Sadly, in the final stages of their life, they've been diagnosed with horrific illnesses.

I think you have to understand. That not everyone is the same and not everyone is going through the same season. So if you are like a 30-year-old something, or 40 something old, or 50-year-old, or maybe you are even a 20-year-old, right? and you are comparing yourself on the internet to people who have completely different responsibilities to you and then feeling bad that you can't do as much or you don't have the opportunities or you can't dedicate as much time.

I think we have to start there. And I think you have to really stop the guilt, stop the comparison, and just accept where you are. That I think that's really, really important and I really wanted to speak about that. And I think the other thing I want to talk about also is the unspoken guilt of needing space slowness and softness.

So I think that, again, this is just my experience, and you may think of it differently, but I just think there's this like. If you are living a slow life or you are, if you're not like on the hamster wheel 24 7 or if you are like not busy 24 7 running around like high on coffee, like you are somehow failing in life, and I just don't believe that bullshit.

Like I've, I'm gonna be really honest with you guys that listening to this. I used to be that kind of go, go go person and I can still be that person. Like when I'm in launches, let's go. When I'm in launch season, when I'm in event season, I'm that person. But I can't do that all year round anymore. And it's not because I don't have the energy, but I just don't want to like.

I just don't want to be going on my, I, I want to have chilled out evenings with my husband. I want to go to the gym in the evenings. I want to see my family and friends at the weekend. I want to, in the evenings read a book I want to watch. He senders like I don't wanna be working. Like it's okay to do it now and again, but even when my like really busy seasons come in, you are very rarely.

See me working past eight o'clock ever. So I really want you to be really, a takeaway from this section for you would be, is that I think you really wanna define what success looks like for you. That's the first piece. Like outside of a crisis, what does success look like for you? What do you actually want your life to look and feel like?

Like I asked myself this question today, this morning, like, what do I want my Q4 life to look like? What do I want it to feel like? What is my big vision? So many people don't ask these, some these questions to themselves, and then they get on this hamster wheel and then months and years pass by, and they've maybe built a business that they don't even love.

You know? And I know maybe I'm being a little bit negative today, but that's not my intention. My intention is to really. Show you like, what do you actually want and how can you build a business that you, that supports you in hard seasons, that supports you in general? Because most of us start a business not to become an employee.

We start an own business because we wanna live life on our terms. And so many people don't do that, and they just fall into the trap of like. Oh, but it's always been like this, so I've gotta do it this way. I, I was doing this back in, when I was doing my wedding planning business. People would be like, oh yeah, but you know, all summer you are gonna be like fully booked.

You won't me to go on a holiday. I was like, no. Last, like, I don't know, two weeks of August or. September or whenever it was, I would take time out and be like, oh my God. Like how come you're like losing bookings and you know you're not working? And I would just be like, well this is what I wanna do. Like you start a business to create the life that you want.

Right. So I think those are the com couple of things that I really wanted to preface. Now let's get into the practical ways to lead yourself through a really hard season. So last year when I had two family members pass away, we knew that like at least one of them was gonna pass away, which was really sad.

and I was also going through some health stuff, and I think the first thing is, is, Let your clients know gently and clearly. You don't have to overshare, but communication builds trust. So let them know what to expect from you. So I remember sending out an email to all my clients saying at the, at the time, you know, like now fully booked one-to-one clients.

I think I had like eight one-to-one clients. I was leading a mastermind. I had my membership, so I just let everyone know what was going on. And I never had to do that before. Like, I've touched wood, you know, only had like one big family death in the last, like couple of years before these ones. So I, I didn't know.

And I, I was thinking, oh my God, are people gonna think I'm like, weeks I can't pull myself together? Like, why can't I just get my shit together and not be there for people and show up for my clients? But actually I just couldn't, like, I remember one of my clients. Taz onto among clients. Shout out to Taz.

And I remember she, I remember like three or four days after one of the funerals, I was gonna have a, I think the funeral was on a Tuesday. I was gonna have a call with her on a Friday thinking, okay, three days is gonna be enough. And I actually just couldn't do it. I literally could not show up to that call.

So I vox. Taz and I said, I'm really sorry, but like, I'm really struggling. I just can't show up to today's call. Like, I'm just not in my best energy. And I just, I remember crying to her own books and I just had a few tears and she was so wonderful. So lovely. So I think, I think that's really important.

Now that goes to my second point, which please don't hate me for this, but I think this is also important to share. I think sometimes when you're working for yourself, and I've definitely been guilty of this, is that it's really easy when you are going through a tough season to get into a rut and not do anything.

So. How can I say this? So I remember in July, we, well, June, at the end of June this year, we had like the fourth family death. And it was really unexpected. The person who passed away was extremely young. It was difficult circumstances. Tragic circumstances. It was just honestly awful. And this one, I think, hit me the hardest because it was someone I was very close to.

She was like a, she was a Bobbie. And, it, it really got me. It really got me to a point where I was literally spent so many days in my house, like in my room, just crying to myself, like for an hour I would just cry. I found it very, very, very difficult, very difficult. And I allowed myself the space for like two weeks.

I moved around some calls and I like, I knew until the funeral hadn't been done, I was gonna feel like this. 'cause I feel like after the funeral's done, you do get that bit of closure, but as soon as the funeral was done, like obviously the next day is really raw and awful. So I didn't do anything the next day, but like later that week, especially the week after, on the Monday, I started challenging myself to work.

Because sometimes it's really easy to get into a rut, be a victim, think, why is this happening to me? The world's falling apart. I don't wanna go on social media, I don't wanna show up for myself. I don't wanna do calls. But I think at some point, and only you will know the reason, like the know, the kind of like the time when you need to do this is when, when do you have to challenge yourself to actually do the work?

You know, like a lot of people do get into stuck in ruts, do get stuck in the victim mentality and that lasts for weeks and months and then that impacts their confidence. It's a lot harder to get restarted. It's a lot harder to build momentum. So I would definitely think about this. If you do go through a hard season, like can you co sometimes compartmentalize?

And if you can, then. Give yourself some grace, like ease yourself into work. I also think that's so important for so many of us. We work from home, especially me, and if I'm literally sitting around YouTube, like watching Netflix and YouTube all day and not doing much and eating crap, I'm feeling worse. And sometimes you don't feel like working when you, you are navigating a hard season or coming towards the end of a hard season, but actually that's the exact thing that you actually need.

So that's really important. The other practical way I wanted to talk about is. I touched on just previously is set stay softly structured. So give it some gentle rhythm. So even one or two core tasks per day to really anchor your nervous system, I think is really important. 'cause you don't wanna, obviously, overwhelm yourself.

You don't wanna dysregulate your nervous system, you know, just gently ease yourself in. I've just come off a, a pretty intense summer. and I've had a couple of weeks off, but like this week is like my week to do my work, my vi work on my vision, work on my marketing work, work on like the projects that we have going on with the team.

And then next week I'll get back into client work and I think that's really important. That's always really helps me rather than like jumping into like big calls. The other thing I wanna also say is check your commitments and calendars. So, I know this sounds really morbid, but. You know, we're all getting older, right?

At some point, you know, parents are gonna pass, really close. Un uncles and aunties are gonna pass. Like, it's so sad, but I've been thinking about this a lot and it sounds really morbid, but it's true. So I think that like think thinking, looking at things like your contracts, looking at things like, you know, what's coming up in your business, any launches and adjusting where needed.

You don't need stress to compound when you are going through a tough season. So just, just being mindful of things like that. The other thing I also wanna say is batch your head in good seasons. So fingers crossed, touch wood. Knock on wood. Everyone. For myself now, like I feel like the, I feel like the, hopefully the.

The family deaths have like passed and I know like from September to December now I've got like a really good season coming up. I've got a good clear season. Obviously there's gonna be Ali in between, but in general I've got four months now to compare. Three months to completely knuckle down. So if you are in a good season right now and you are listening that to this, get ahead in your good season.

Batch ahead. In your good season. What I mean by this is podcast newsletters, Instagram, you know, content creation in Airtable, projects that you've had, like just kept off. Like, do those now, right? When you are in overflow, when you're in a good season. Get shit done. I can't stress this enough. You just have to get the shit done.

Like, don't be like thinking, oh my God, I like need to do this. I, you know, I'll do this then I'll do. No, like I, in the past, like, when was it? I think not last year, the year before, one of our family members who unfortunately did pass away last year. He was hospitalized like two years ago and you know, they were saying that he's gonna pass, but he didn't actually, he did last like another year.

But I remember like in that season, like I don't know what it was that year, but I'd left the event side of things a slightly late just because of all the things that were going on. But now I'm like, literally I'm like my event. I'm planning on getting it all done and dusted by like October, November.

Like I'm not waiting around for anything or anyone like I'm just getting it done because it's so much less stressful. But again, I think the problem with us can be, is that we are addicted to chaos. And we are addicted to overwhelm and we are addicted to things being hard. So we actually subconsciously sabotage ourselves, leave things to the last minute.

And then of course, then of course you're gonna be stressed, and of course you're gonna be overwhelmed. Of course you're gonna be, you know, scrambling to put things together. So. Batch ahead. In your good seasons, get it done. Now come and tell me on Instagram what you've got batched ahead. And this is something that I'm really prioritizing like now, like I'm gonna be batching ahead, like my podcasts, my newsletters, where I can, my content.

'cause when you batch ahead, things just get so much easier for you and your business. So for batching, batching for me looks like on Mondays and Tuesdays, getting my podcast done, getting my newsletter done, getting my content done. Then Wednesdays, I normally have client days and Thursdays, and then Fridays can be like my CEO day, like things that I'm working on in the business.

Like you can do that whatever way you want.structuring your week, but obviously there's, the more marketing you can do, the more high quality marketing you can do. You know, the more clients, the line clients that you'll get. So that's really important. So also if you do go through a really hard season, like I've had clients who've gone through, you know, family members, being diagnosed with cancer, like IVF, obviously batching ahead is something that I've always shared with them.

But the other thing you could also do is simplify your marketing. So, for example, when I've gone through bad seasons, I have still shared on stories because I found that really easy. I've still recycled high conversing post. On Instagram, I've recycled some of my emails and I kind of, still share those.

So anything that you've got in your business that you can actually like, repurpose and recycle, definitely do that. And you can be building like something in Airtable for this. So Airtable, I believe it's free, it's really low cost. Or you can use something like Notion, which is really popular at the moment, and you can start to actually.

Put all of your high converting posts in there. You can start to put captions in there, images in there, you can put in there, emails or you know, if you don't want 'em to use Airtable notion, you can literally use a Google Doc. Just so you've got something then, and so you know when things, things happen, then you've got those, you know, you could use this for if you're going on maternity leave or if you're going on holiday, or maybe it's the Christmas period and you still want content going out.

That's something that we are gonna be doing this year in December. Like obviously we're gonna be having our event in February, so we do need to have event content going out over Christmas. Other content and emails, and I normally get those scheduled literally like before I head off Christmas, like early December, ever since then.

Then scheduled till early Jan and I don't need to worry about it. And then sales are coming in, people are buying in the background, which is just the best feeling. Okay, so let's move on to the. Kind of like the final part of this is lessons that I've learned from my hardest seasons.and these seasons taught me that my business needs to support me, not rely me, not me, not the business, relying on me being in a good mood to make money.

So the first thing is first reoccurring income is really a non-negotiable. So obviously for me and a lot of my clients, we do have stacked reoccurring income. So what this basically means is we either have clients on retainers. For me, I have my membership, I have clients that are on payment plans. I also have, I don't talk about this a lot, but I also have my property business and my property portfolio that obviously brings in recurring income for me.

This is something that I haven't built overnight. It is taken a ti like a lot of time. I mean, I bought my first property, gosh, it was like, I dunno, like 14, 15 years ago. So it is been definitely in the making. But my forties are gonna really thank me for this and when I've been going through a hard season, I don't need to be then like panicking about money because I've got reoccurring income coming in every month, which is just amazing.

And it gives you stability and space, you know, that's really important. The other thing I would say is that the other lesson that I've learned is make it easy to people to buy from you. So is it easy for people in your audience to book a call with you to buy from a sales page, to find out in a retreat that you're hosting, an event that you're hosting, or about your services?

That's really important. You know, I make consistent sales in my business all of the time. I know that I've got to this amazing stage in my business where, you know, it is taken time and effort and growth pains to do that, and we're still building on it. Like I've got big visions for my business. but I think what's really important is you have to make it easy to people to buy from you.

The other thing is. Is having an ecosystem that actually brings in clients and sales and is nurturing people even when you're offline or even when you are literally. Going through a hard season. So for me, I don't just have a content platform. I have an email platform, and my emails are always building trust or making sales.

They're building trust or making sales. And so much of my revenue every year comes through emails. It actually like, I think for me, like Instagram, and this is something that we're really working on, Instagram is always. I would say it does really well for like my, maybe my lower cost offers and my event, and obviously I do get like one-to-one clients from there.

I do get masterminders from there. Of course I do, but there's other strategies in my business, the ecosystem, so to speak, that actually makes the sales even when I'm offline, and that's really important to build that in your business. This is something that I help my clients with, so if that's something of interest to you, do reach out to me.

That's really, really important. I think the other thing is funnels as well. This is something that we are testing in my business this year, which I'm really, really excited about. because I want new women finding my work, finding me even when I'm resting or healing or recovering. So that's really, really important.

And the last thing I also wanted to say is kind of what I touched on now, is that. If you have time now use it wisely. Like nothing waits for anyone. The algorithms are constantly changing. Things are constantly changing. Now is the best time. Like there were people in the pandemic that didn't take advantage of the pandemic.

There were people like years and years ago that didn't take advantage of Instagram. You know, being able to build quickly an audience on Instagram. You know, a couple of years ago you could really quickly build an audience, generate income in your business, right? It's obviously changed a lot now. I talk about that in a future episode, but even if you're full-time job now, even if you've got children, or even if you're pregnant, or even if you're on maternity leave or you, whatever's going on, just do it.

Just do it. Just use your time wisely. And put it into your business because it will. If you love your business, you're passionate about what you do. And you want to help people, then it's gonna come back to you. Twofold, fivefold. Okay, so let's just finish up with some nervous system regulation that I did in my business.

And I really think nervous system regulation is really important. and this might something that you might have heard of, you might not have. I've definitely talked about it in future episodes, but you can't be visible, magnetic or strategic if your nervous system is in freeze.I'm not gonna go into like, we need a whole podcast episode about the nervous system, but tools that supported me to regulate myself, which basically means regulate my nervous system.

So I felt stable, calm and centered were things like. EFT that I love, love, love. EFT. This is something that we do in my membership. actually got brought out an amazing, low cost offer. Right now it's only 22 pounds and it's got some of my emotional freedom technique, videos in it where you can process your emotions and feel calm.

Overall. breath work. I'm really used to clear energy and re reset my internal state. Journaling of conscious work. Obviously I'm a big believer of that. To require your thoughts gently. That's really important. That's something that I constantly do. You know, community I think is really important. Spaces where you feel seen and not judged.

and I think that having like mentors is so important. For me, it was having a mentor. It was having my close friends, it was having family members that I could. You know, really be myself and be vulnerable and just cry and just let it all out. I think this whole thing of like, let's be really strong and keep it all in and don't cry and don't be emotional.

I think that's just. A recipe for disaster, and it's dysregulating a nervous system if you're not processing your emotions. For, for me, having those people close, trusted people, some that were paid, some that weren't, has been honestly, so healing. I feel like, especially when women come together, there's something so healing.

When women come together and talk about their problems and they can be vulnerable with each other, that is just so, so healing. Especially when you are a female founder, a female entrepreneur, and you're holding a lot of space and energy for people. Like for me, I hold so much space with so many people. I need that for myself.

If I don't have that money for myself, I'm just gonna end up burning up, burning out. So obviously all of these EFT breathwork journaling community spaces that I've spoken about, we do actually use this in my female entrepreneur club, and this is my membership designed to support women in business with the subconscious mind.

marketing and that nervous system safety, you can literally join now. I think it's only like 44 pounds. If you're interested in that, do drop me a DM with the word membership. We can send you the details. And we're actually having our first autumn meetup networking meetup later this month in September.

So if you join before then, you can absolutely come along to that in London. And it's gonna be an amazing networking dinner, which I'm so excited about. So that kind of comes to a close. I feel like I did, this was a little bit of a long episode, but I really have, I really hope that you found it really helpful, really empowering, really impactful, and hopefully it can help you if you're going through a hard season right now.

Or you know, you know that a hard season is coming up. And let me be really honest, hard seasons don't escape any of us. We're all human beings having a human experience. And unfortunately we do, we do go through this at some point. So if you have been going through a hard season, I do send you so, so much love.

and I just wanted to share some really lovely affirmations with you that can, that can help you. I, here they are. You don't need to be perfect to be powerful. You don't need to be on to be impactful. You get to be human. You get to be held. You get to build a business that can make space for all of you.

Thank you so much everyone for listening to this week's episode. And do drop me a d if you would like to come to our London event. Drop me the word London. I'm on Sean dot Chira, dot mentor my, my, my. Actually handle has changed. We'll update it in the show notes for you. And if you want to join our membership, if you wanna feel deeply supported in business and life, then drop me the word membership and we'll also leave it in the show notes for you and share this episode with a friend, you know, who's going through a hard time.

Let's hold each other in this, in this time. and if you did love this episode, do come and say hi to me on Instagram. It means the world to me to hear your feedback and your messages. So, yeah, have an amazing week and we will chat soon.